“We are what we repeatedly do, and excellence then is not an act but a habit?” – Aristotle.
Our lives are largely dependent on our habits and consistent actions.
You may not be defined by what you occasionally do, but your consistent habits determine a large part of your life’s outcome.
If you’ve ever seen or met a happily married couple, you can bet that they have habits they stick to and principles they live by.
I’ll be gracious enough to share the daily habits of happily married couples.
Feel free to use it as a checklist to improve your relationship or marriage.
9 Things Happily Married Couples Do Everyday
1. Choose to love their partner
If you thought that loving your partner would come easily and naturally to you all the time, you should think again.
Happily ever after is a myth for people who aren’t willing to put in the work.
Contrary to popular belief, love isn’t a never-ending exhilarating feeling of excitement and butterflies.
It’s a decision you make to stay committed and excited about one person in a special way every day for the rest of your life, especially if it’s a marriage.
There may be days when they do not feel in love with their partner, but happily married couples choose to love their partner every day.
They make the decision and act on it by expressing love and affection for their partner regardless of their feelings.
It could be through nice gestures, romantic touch, and words, kind and affectionate words, or support.
Happily married couples understand that they both may have their way of feeling loved and appreciated, and they try to speak each other’s language daily.
If people depended on their feelings, they would express love once in a while, whenever they feel like it.
2. Choose peace
When you see a happy couple, it’s hardly ever because they never have issues or fight.
It’s because they know how to handle it.
Happily married couples choose peace in their personal lives and marriage daily.
They do this by practicing forgiveness and tolerance and creating space for each other’s excesses.
They understand that no one is perfect and mistakes will happen, so they’re patient with each other as they navigate life.
Conflict resolution is not a time to bicker at each other or judge each other but a time to dialogue, understand each other’s perspectives, and arrive at a mutually acceptable solution.
This makes them more peaceful and happy as they address and resolve conflicts in their marriage.
3. Appreciate their partner
On some days, through words; on other days, through actions.
Happily married couples show appreciation for each other daily.
If a marriage is working, it’s because the people in it are making it work.
Couples who are happily married take time to express gratitude for each other’s efforts and dedication to the marriage.
They acknowledge the positive impact their partner has on them and how better their life is with them in it.
This makes them even more encouraged and motivated to do more.
4. Share responsibility
When you see a couple constantly fighting about responsibilities or one party overburdened, it’s because they have not hacked this.
Couples with blissful marriages share responsibilities.
It’s never about roles for them but about each person’s strengths and weaknesses and showing up for each other as much as they can.
They work as a team, sharing tasks fairly and showing support for each other in their roles.
This minimizes the chances for rancor and chaos because no one feels cheated.
5. Respect each other
Showing respect for each other daily is another thing that happily married couples do.
They understand that no one is less deserving of respect, so they maintain mutual respect.
They show respect for their partner through their words, actions, and lifestyle.
Treating each other with kindness, warmth, and consideration.
6. Spend time together and communicate
Happily married couples spend time with each other every day.
When I hear of couples who go days without spending time together or communicating, I know there’s a huge deficit in their relationship.
Even in a long-distance marriage, happily married couples create time to bond and connect over phone calls and video calls.
I recall when my partner and I were in different physical locations and each consumed with work; we knew that if we weren’t more intentional, the bliss and love we were experiencing would be affected.
So, we consciously created time to talk every day.
We tried to stay connected throughout our day through small gestures that showed that we were thinking about each other: calls, text messages, and even ordering surprise presents.
No matter how busy they are, happily married couples try to intentionally create time for each other and spend time talking and bonding.
It could be through shared meals, random chats, conversations, or activities, they laugh together, talk about important stuff, actively listen to each other, and are there for each other.
They are genuinely interested in each other’s lives and try to stay connected as much as they can.
They don’t compromise on quality time because they know that that’s how they bond, encourage each other, offer support and assistance, and celebrate each other’s wins.
7. Have fun and play
This is one thing I’ve observed with most happily married couples.
They create the time and environment for fun and excitement with each other.
Happily married couples also have their fair share of life’s challenges, but they don’t let it stop them from being happy.
They have a healthy mindset and outlook on life, positively facing challenges.
Amid life happening, they maintain a sense of humor.
You can find them at random moments giggling to inside jokes with each other.
They try to create moments of levity even in challenging situations.
8. Maintain physical intimacy
Unless they’re temporarily far from each other, happily married couples maintain physical contact daily.
They understand the importance of physical intimacy and don’t joke about it.
They may not have sex every day, but hugs, holding of hands, a playful smack on the bum, reassuring back rubs, kisses, or other forms of affection are usually present in the equation somewhere.
9. Show concern for each other
Happily married couples do not isolate themselves from each other’s lives and turn a deaf ear to their partner’s pain.
They show empathy towards each other every day and try to be there for each other, especially during difficult seasons of life.
Their priority is each other’s well-being, and this is seen in how they behave.
They see it as their responsibility to take care of each other’s physical, emotional, and mental health, and so they do.
This leads to a happier and healthier marriage where each party feels supported and seen.
If you look closely into the lives of genuinely happy couples, you’re sure to find these habits.
This may not be all of it, but these habits are the pillars and foundation that will create a deeper connection and a more fulfilling marriage.
When practiced, these habits can help couples nurture their marriage and create a strong foundation for a lasting union.