As a married person, there are things you can talk to only your close friends about.
It’s not that these things are inappropriate or out of place.
It’s just that your close friends are the ones who are more likely to understand your point of view and exactly how you feel about what you are telling them.
You won’t even bother talking to people other than your close friends about such things to avoid being judged unfairly and to avoid stirring unnecessary controversy.
In this piece, we’ll discuss some things married women confide only to close friends.
Let’s get to it.
7 Things Married Women Confide Only To Close Friends
1. Disagreements with their husbands
One of the things married women confide only to close friends is the disagreements and arguments they have with their husbands.
There are times when the married life can feel very overwhelming and draining.
During those times, a wife can feel unappreciated or underappreciated.
She’ll feel like her input and sacrifices in her home and marriage go unnoticed and unappreciated.
I’m talking about when she and her husband are in the heat of some type of argument, and no one is trying to understand the other or see each other’s point of view.
If you’ve ever had such a heated argument with a loved one, especially your spouse, you’ll understand the feeling.
You’ll feel worked up and drained.
You’ll just know that you need to take a break, confide in someone else, and clear your head before you lose it.
And who else can you confide in to see things from your point of view except your close friends?
They are there to give you a listening ear, understand where you are coming from, not judge you (sometimes), criticize, and weigh the matter.
They are also the people who will tell you the truth (true friends) without mincing words and challenge you to do the right thing.
Except you are feeling so miserable, desperate, and alone, it’s not advisable to go about talking to strangers or people who are not close to you about any problems or disagreements you are having with your husband.
It’s not even good to invite a third party into your marital affairs, except for very serious cases.
2. Their experiences with their husband’s family
Marriage is a union of not just two individuals but two different families who are from different backgrounds and might have different beliefs and practices.
One of the things married women confide only to close friends are the things they experience with their husband’s family.
There may be things a woman’s in-laws are used to doing and consider normal that is new and foreign to her.
It’s normal for her to take off to gist with her close friends about her new discovery about the family she’s married into.
Then, she can equally confide in them about her relationship, both good and bad, with her husband’s different relatives.
She’ll also likely share with them her experiences with her in-laws, both as individuals and collectively as a family unit.
I don’t think any woman will feel comfortable with telling her husband about such things.
Well, except she finds him to be the open-minded and non-judgemental type who wouldn’t think that she’s finding faults with his dear family members.
Some husbands can even go as far as thinking that she’s telling him those things because she’s expecting him to pick sides with her over them.
So, to be on the safer side and avoid stirring unnecessary controversy with her husband, she’ll prefer to confide only in her close friends about such things.
3. Their finances
Another thing on the list of things married women confide only to close friends is their finances.
I’m talking about their financial worth, achievements, and investments.
There are women who feel more comfortable with talking and sharing information about their finances with their close friends than discussing such with their husbands.
Yes.
There are women like that.
Men like that also exist, but we’re going to focus on women for the sake of the context of this article.
Such women keep their financial worth away from their husbands for various reasons.
For instance, they may feel that letting their husbands know their real financial worth will make them insecure.
It can also be that they’re afraid that their husband will withdraw certain financial privileges he offers them if he finds out that they are financially well off.
That is, he might cut down on or stop giving them personal allowances, wardrobe allowances, travel allowances, and things like that.
They might also fear that he might start leaving some serious bills for them to pick.
Although the reasons vary across different couples, they are convinced that it’s a valid reason why they choose to keep their financial worth from their husbands.
They know their partners better and know what they’re capable of doing with such information about them.
But they feel that their close friends won’t really wield any power over them by having such information about them.
And that’s why they feel more comfortable confiding in them about it.
4. Male attention
I don’t think that women outgrow getting attention from the male gender.
What I’m trying to say is that women of all ages, old and young, single and married, tend to still get attention from men from time to time.
It is, and feels very normal to experience such when you are still single.
But when you are still getting a lot of male attention, even when you are married, it feels different.
And different women react differently to such attention.
Some women may feel irritated by the fact that another man is admiring and possibly desiring them to the extent of walking up to talk to them, perhaps with an obvious ring on her finger.
Such a woman won’t find it funny and may tell the man off there and then, and still call or visit her close friends to rant about her experience.
On the other hand, there are also women who will be pleasantly surprised if they are admired and approached by other men despite being married.
The admiration will make them happy because to them, it’s a sort of assurance and confidence boost that they are still very much beautiful and attractive enough, even after being married for years and perhaps, bearing children.
Such a woman will smile with a heartwarming and proud face, thanking the man for his interest before pointing out that she is married.
She can’t wait to get to her close friends to share the news with them.
There are also some other women who are indifferent to being admired and approached by other men.
They feel that it’s normal for a woman to be admired and approached, no matter her age and status.
They believe that it’s natural for women of all ages.
So, they act indifferent about the whole experience and may or may not share it with their close friends.
The bottom line is that if they want to talk about it at all, it has to be with their close friends who understand their point of view.
These friends will not judge them for however they choose to feel about and handle the attention they get from men who aren’t their husbands.
5. Intimacy in their marriage
Are you surprised that this made the list?
You shouldn’t be.
Different people choose to talk about different things, and for some married women, one of the things they choose to talk about to their close friends is the intimacy in their marriage.
Some people are free-minded and do not feel wierd discussing things that may otherwise sound awkward to a sensitive person.
Such women can confide only to their close friends about the sex life in their marriage.
They can talk about whether they are getting too little or too much intimacy and whether they feel that the sex is good, bad, or just there.
They may also talk about ways to satisfy their husbands sexually and keep them very much interested in them.
For instance, they can offer suggestions on how to always be neat, work out routines that will help them stay fit, wear clothes suitable for their husband’s eyes only, and smell nice within and outside the house.
6. Their marital challenges
Marital challenges are one of the things married women confide in only to close friends.
A woman will feel more comfortable talking about the problems she faces in her marriage to her close friends, especially the married ones.
This is because she feels that they are on similar journeys and so can relate.
It can be about financial issues within the family.
She might be having difficulties with handling her children.
For instance, she doesn’t know how to be firm yet gentle with them and raise them in the right way.
It can also be her having to deal with an irresponsible husband who is probably a cheat, financially indisciplined, and overbearing.
Most times, she’ll talk about these issues she’s facing in her marriage to her friends because she believes that they are in the best position to advice her and tell her what to do to remedy such problems.
She won’t risk talking to mere strangers about her plight to avoid ‘washing her dirty linen in public.’
7. The stress of housekeeping
One of the things married women confide only to close friends is the stress they have to go through in housekeeping.
Just like in point 6 above, a married woman will choose to confide in her close friends, especially the married ones, because she feels that they can relate to what she is going through and will be in the best position to tell her ways to ease her burden.
Sometimes, it’s nothing serious.
Her close friends also double as her ‘rant buddies,’ and they listen to each other rant and let off steam from the stress of housekeeping.
Other times, they throw in tips and suggestions that they consider useful here and there for them to try out.
For example, they can suggest hiring a housekeeper or buying certain home appliances, such as a dishwasher, washing machine, vacuum cleaner, etc., to help ease the stress of housekeeping.
Transitioning from single to married life is, indeed, not easy.
That’s why you need wise and trusted people around you – your close friends.