An ideal relationship is one in which both partners feel secure, loved, and respected.
However, when there’s insecurity in a relationship, it gnaws at the very fabric of a once-wholesome relationship.
There may or may not be things that will make you feel insecure in your relationship.
Your insecurities might arise from your partner’s behavior or from your thoughts and projections.
Whichever the case, feeling insecure is bound to make you cultivate unhealthy behaviors that can prove destructive to your relationship.
If care is not taken, your insecurities might mark the beginning of the end of your relationship.
In this article, we’ll be discussing signs you are insecure in your relationship.
Sometimes, these signs may not be too obvious at the onset.
You might mistake them for love till you’re neck deep into them.
That’s why you should read to the end, to know if you’re guilty of being insecure or not in your relationship.
Without wasting more time, let’s get started.
8 Signs You Are Insecure In Your Relationship
1. You are obsessed with your partner
One of the signs you are insecure in your relationship is that you are obsessed with your partner.
There’s a thin line between being in love and being obsessed, and you’ve long crossed that line without even knowing it.
At the beginning of the relationship, it’s normal to always want to be with and hear from your partner.
You always want to spend every passing second with them and can’t seem to get enough of them.
It’s expected.
But as time passes, this feeling wears off a bit, and you settle back into living a normal life.
You hear from them regularly, but not as if they’re the air you breathe.
But if you still find yourself clinging to them always, and not wanting to let go, it’s because you’ve developed some form of obsession for them, and it’s unhealthy.
2. You’re constantly snooping around their devices
Do you find that you are constantly snooping around your partner’s devices?
It’s one of the signs you are insecure in your relationship.
You’re always looking for every opportunity to snoop on their phones, tablets, laptops, and other devices to see what they’ve been up to, who they’ve been talking to, and what they’ve been discussing with the person.
They might have shared with you about how their day went, but you don’t really believe what they told you.
You want to see things for yourself through the lens of their devices.
You want to know if they are looking ‘outside,’ talking to other people, catching feelings for them, and possibly cheating on you with them.
3. You are too clingy to your partner
If you are always acting all clingy around your partner, it can be an indication that you’re insecure in your relationship.
Although there are people who are naturally clingy, I’m not talking about that type of clinginess.
Yours is different.
Whenever you’ve not heard from or seen your partner, you tend to feel alone in the relationship.
In fact, you have lost your individuality in the relationship because you’ve built your life around your partner.
Now, you cling to them like the air you breathe.
Without them around, you can’t function properly because your life now begins and ends with them.
You don’t have other relationships in your life that you invest in, but give yourself wholly to your partner.
4. You’re constantly monitoring their movements and whereabouts
In addition to snooping around their devices, you’re always monitoring their movements and checking their whereabouts.
It’s one of the signs you are insecure in your relationship.
You always want to know where they are, where they’ve been, who they’re with, and who they’ve been with.
Even when they tell you, you want to verify by yourself to know if they are telling the truth.
If you could turn yourself into a fly to perch on the wall everywhere they go, you definitely would do that.
What a stressful way to live!
5. You’re constantly seeking validation from your partner
If you’re constantly seeking validation from the hands of your partner, it’s one of the signs you’re insecure in your relationship.
It appears that you have built your entire life around your partner and have no mind and say of your own anymore.
It may or may not be a case of having low self-esteem.
It probably started off as you wanting to please them and make them happy all the time.
Now, you just want to do right by them every time, and it doesn’t matter what you want.
It’s as if you’re existing for the sole purpose of doing whatever they want.
6. You suspect everyone of the opposite gender you find around them
If you suspect every one of the opposite gender that you find around them, it’s one of the signs you are insecure in your relationship.
You always show clear discomfort whenever they’re with or speaking to people of the opposite gender.
It does not matter who these people are or the business they have with your partner.
Once you see them interacting, discomfort sets in.
You start hyperventilating, getting all touchy and angry for nothing, and generally acting up.
You’ll remain in this mood till they finish their conversation or whatever business they have together.
You may even take it a step further to demand explanations from your partner about the people who they’re interacting with, always, once they are of the opposite gender.
To make it worse, you can ask their friends, family members, and work colleagues, too.
Whoever doesn’t tell you what you want to hear automatically becomes a suspect, and you believe that they’re in support of causing your relationship to crash.
7. You try to control them
If you’re fond of exhibiting controlling behavior with your partner, you are probably feeling insecure in your relationship.
I know that sometimes, we make sacrifices that make sense for our partners and for peace to reign in our relationships.
But when our partners make certain demands that do not make sense and appear to be based solely on sentiments, you pass on making sacrifices on such grounds.
For instance, you expect your partner to end certain friendships and partnerships simply because you are uncomfortable with the individuals involved.
You might even demand it from them and make ultimatums for such a flimsy reason.
It doesn’t make sense and doesn’t hold any water.
You don’t expect your partner to bend to your every whim without thinking and being logical about their actions.
As long as it’s not hurting you or posing as a threat to you, let them live their lives the same way they let you live yours.
8. You’re always seeking reassurance from your partner
It’s normal to seek reassurance from your partner from time to time in a relationship.
Sometimes, we get so busy and caught up with life that we place our loved ones second.
In those moments, they feel unseen, unnoticed, and unappealing to us.
That’s where reassurance comes in.
Even if your love for each other is glaring and you’ve been together for a long time, you still need to hear them reassure you of the love they have for you.
However, if you always seek reassurance from your partner, this is a sign of insecurity in your relationship.
And this is not about words of affirmation being part of your love language.
It’s a case of deep-seated insecurities.
By constantly reassuring you, your partner is pouring into a void that’s in your life, and you’re hoping that it gets filled up with their reassurances.
However, healing starts from within and manifests on the outside.
If you don’t work on yourself and make an active effort to heal yourself and fill up the void within you, you’ll keep needing to be constantly reassured by everyone you’ll be with.
And guess what?
They’ll never be able to fill that void.
Only you can do that.