Are there things a married woman should never do at work?
I have had many interesting conversations with different people concerning creating boundaries at the workplace and the boundaries needed to protect your marriage.
Through all these conversations, one thing is sure – whether you’re married, engaged, or single, you should establish boundaries in your workplace.
But you must know that different people have different ideas about proper boundaries.
In this context, whether a marriage is struggling or blossoming, it needs boundaries to protect both the relationship itself and the people in it.
Even if you had noble intentions, you can unknowingly let other relationships hinder your marriage’s success.
Many full-time employees spend more time with their work colleagues than with their partners and families daily.
So, as a married woman, you now know that there are things you should never do at work.
Let’s see some of them.
7 Things A Married Woman Should Never Do At Work
1. Spending time alone with a member of the opposite sex
One of the things a married woman should never do at work is spend a lot of time alone with a member of the opposite sex if it can be avoided.
A politician once made a rule never to be alone eating a meal, in a car, or a meeting with any woman other than his wife.
He got a lot of backlash for that decision, and many people felt it was limiting and silly to his career.
A few months later, accusations of improper conduct started flying around about other politicians.
That politician’s rule saved him from catching a bullet of accusation, and it didn’t seem so silly and limiting after all.
As a married woman, do you think this rule is necessary, and you can pull it off?
Then, go for it.
You can meet up at lunch instead of riding in a car together.
You can arrive at your meetings with clients in separate cars.
You can also schedule work meetings at open yet cozy venues.
2. Discussing your marital issues with work colleagues
If you’re having any issues in your marriage (let’s say that you don’t get along too well with your husband or don’t see eye-to-eye on something), the last thing you should do is turn to a work colleague to talk about it.
Never share things that happen in your marriage with your work colleagues, whether male or female.
As the saying goes, “The walls have ears”.
Word may get out that you’re having marital issues, which may attract unwanted and unnecessary attention from other workers in the organization.
If you must have a confidant, let it be a friend who’s not your work colleague.
Although it’s relatively easier to open up to and confide in your desk mate or who you share a lunch break with daily, it’s something you mustn’t do.
3. Referring to someone as a ‘work spouse’
Referring to a work colleague as your ’work husband’ or ‘work wife’ is cringeworthy.
It is especially so if you’re married.
A work spouse is someone you have an intimate relationship with at work (who is not your spouse, by the way).
It doesn’t matter if your husband (in this context) doesn’t mind you using the term.
It’s advisable to eliminate it and reevaluate your relationship with the man you used the term for.
Don’t hesitate to do that if you have to set firmer and clearer boundaries to ensure that your relationship with this person is not seen as what it’s not.
The boundaries will also help to prevent your relationship with them from turning into what you never intended sometime in the future.
4. Sharing things with a colleague first before your husband
One of the things a married woman should never do at work is share things with a colleague first before her husband.
Generally, this is a good rule for every healthy and successful marriage.
Whenever you need or want to share something with someone else, your husband should be the first person you share it with.
For instance, if you patronize a new restaurant that you love their services, get a raise, or even make a mistake at work, he’s one call away to listen to your rants and squeals of joy.
Except it’s a work-related issue and doesn’t need your husband’s input, he should be the first person to hear whatever you have to share.
5. Hangout regularly with your work colleagues after work hours
As a married person (woman, in this case), you shouldn’t hang out with your work colleagues too frequently after work hours.
Although some people do it and see nothing wrong with it, there’s everything wrong with it.
Many people go to play games and have drinks, dinner, or appetizers with their coworkers regularly.
Although it’s a great way of bonding more with other people outside the work environment, doing it regularly is bad news for married couples.
Eventually, you’ll start avoiding going home to your family and instead look forward to these outings.
Then, if you work in an organization where male colleagues surround you, and you hang out with them often, you can start overstepping your boundaries.
It would be best if you were very careful.
Anything can happen when the boundary lines are blurry.
6. Having a work favorite
One of the things a married woman should never do at work is have a work favorite.
Is there a particular work colleague, especially one of the opposite sex, who you always pick to be on your team during work projects?
Or you’re getting something from the break room for them regularly.
These two instances are ways you can have a favorite work colleague.
Please note that this differs from when you do things together at work because they’re good at their job or you’re coincidentally sitting next to each other.
You might need to set some boundaries if you’re doing any of these things:
You want to be on this person’s team for project(s) because it’ll afford you more time together.
You’re going out of your way to treat them or get some of their favorite things.
7. Knowing your co-worker better than you know your husband
Do you know your co-worker better than you know your husband?
It’s one of the things a married woman should never do at work.
Do you know your husband’s preferred pet?
Can you answer the same question about your co-worker?
It’s very easy to learn the habits and preferences of our work colleagues because we spend a greater part of our day with them.
I’m not suggesting that you become a loner and zone out on the people you work with daily.
Far from it!
I’m only saying that you should get to know these intricate details and even much more about your husband.
If it’s anything to go by, you should know almost everything about your husband before giving room for knowledge about your work colleagues in your head.
Conclusion
As I mentioned earlier, different people have different ideas of boundaries.
The bottom line is to create boundaries and be aware of when relationships from work can start to cross the line.
Most times, you won’t notice till it has gone too far.
We make boundaries not to make things difficult or restrict anyone but to protect all the parties in the picture.