Everyone goes into a romantic relationship with the hope that it lasts forever.
I mean, we all want to love and be loved in return.
Although there’s no such thing as perfect love, we dream of it and know that there are chances that we’ll fall out of love and break up with our romantic partner.
Can you relate to this?
Then, you know how terrible a relationship heartbreak can be.
But the pain is minor compared to that of our topic of discourse.
When you love someone, you expect them to love you in return.
But what if, in your case, your man is forcing himself to love you?
The longer you stay in such a relationship, thinking that you’re getting the love you’re giving, the deeper you’ll sink into the sham that it is.
Of course, you’ll eventually be shattered when you find out the truth.
But you can reduce the pain of the heartbreak if you find out early enough in the relationship.
So, how do you find out if he doesn’t love you?
What are the signs he is forcing himself to love you?
Let’s see some clear signs he is forcing himself to love you below.
10 Clear Signs He Is Forcing Himself To Love You
1. You’re not part of his top priority
One of the clear signs he is forcing himself to love you is that he doesn’t make you a part of his top priorities.
At the beginning of the relationship, partners make each other part of their priorities.
And although this may change slightly as the relationship progresses and they get into a long-term relationship, their partners are still somewhere close to the top of their priority lists.
Do you feel like you’re not anywhere near the top of his priority list?
Do you think he chooses to engage in other activities or things over spending time with you?
Does he miss your calls and doesn’t call back fast enough?
Is he always claiming to be very busy?
Well, we all make time for what’s important to us, no matter how busy we get.
Let that sink in before you think of making excuses for him.
Does he often cancel last minute on your dates, or worse still, stand you up?
Is he constantly whining about his busy schedule and expects you to understand that he can’t be there for you always?
Can’t you see that he’s not giving you the relevance you deserve as his partner?
Everything is wrong when the man you’re in a relationship treats you like that.
2. He avoids talking about certain topics
Does he avoid discussing certain topics he terms difficult?
It’s one of the signs he is forcing himself to love you.
Does he say that he wants a long-term relationship with you?
Then, he should know that there should be no boundaries on what you discuss as a couple and be ready to discuss any topic.
Talking about difficult things is important for building and maintaining healthy relationships.
No matter how much he hates having such conversations, he has to do it.
Looking the other way on such topics or pretending that they don’t exist can cause serious problems in your relationship in the long run.
If you’re in a committed relationship, these are some of the bridges you must cross to move forward.
It’s a red flag if he keeps avoiding certain topics with the excuse that he’s uncomfortable discussing them.
Either he’s deceiving you that he loves you or forcing himself to believe that he loves you.
Maybe he just wants to be in a relationship with you but doesn’t love you.
Yes, someone can be in a relationship and not love their partner.
It might be so in your case.
3. He wants your relationship to be a secret
One of the first things you do when you fall in love, is to scream it from the rooftop.
You want to share your good news with your family, friends, and anyone you can tell.
So, what happens if your partner wants to keep your relationship a secret?
Even if he wants to keep it private, at least his family and friends should know that he’s in a relationship.
But he doesn’t tell anyone he’s in a relationship with you.
Let’s not get started on posting your pictures on social media or even tagging you in loved-up photos, videos, and posts.
To top it off, he persuades you to keep the relationship a secret.
If this guy loves you as he says, why is he hiding you?
His attitude suggests that he doesn’t love you, is trying to force himself to love you, or is not ready to be committed to you.
4. He is passive in the relationship
One of the signs he is forcing himself to love you is that he doesn’t take the initiative and is laid back.
In a relationship, both partners share the responsibilities equally – from duties moving the relationship forward to expressing love.
Something is wrong if your partner is not interested in the relationship.
Perhaps you’ve always taken the initiative to get things done in the relationship.
I don’t advise that you keep tabs on what each person did in a relationship.
But it’s not healthy if it gets too one-sided.
In this case, it might be that he’s enjoying everything you’re doing for him and forcing himself to love you to keep the relationship going.
5. He doesn’t include you in his future plans
One of the favorite things two people in love do whenever they’re together is to dream and discuss their future together.
If your partner doesn’t ever picture you in his future whenever he’s talking about it, something is up, and it’s not good.
People naturally start thinking about the future when they feel they’ve met the right partner.
If your man is not interested in any discussion concerning the future, he might not see you as a long-term partner.
Then, if he tells you plainly to stop talking about such plans, he’s just in the relationship for the moment.
He’s forcing himself to love you so that he can remain with you for some time and enjoy the benefits of being in a relationship with you.
6. He tries to change you
Does he try to change you?
It’s one of the signs he is forcing himself to love you.
He claims to love you but is uncomfortable with some of your behavior and mannerisms.
He keeps pointing out your errors and tries to influence your decisions and thoughts.
He constantly tries to change you to match his taste, especially if he is continually nagging about it.
From what you like to eat, dress choices, places you want to visit, type of music you love to your favorite travel destinations.
He’s only forcing himself to love you.
I mean, it’s clear enough.
But why will he stick around you if he feels you’re not up to his taste?
It’s left for him to answer that.
This type of man may not be ready to love you until you adjust to his taste.
7. He suggests a break from the relationship
If he’s suggesting that you take a break from the relationship, it can be a sign that he’s forcing himself to love you.
That he’s forcing himself to love you doesn’t automatically translate to him being a terrible person.
At least, if he’s asking for a break from the relationship, he’s concerned about ending the relationship and hurting you in the process.
He might even feel sad about leaving you, even if he doesn’t love you.
You might find that he keeps asking for breaks whenever things get too difficult in the relationship.
He might even present it in a way that suggests the break is for your good.
In all, you can see that he doesn’t want to continue with the relationship but doesn’t want to hurt you simultaneously.
He just doesn’t see any future in the relationship.
8. He praises his ex a lot
If he is always harping about how perfect his ex was while claiming to love you, this might be a clear sign that he feels nothing for you.
If he is yet to get over his past relationship and constantly compares you to her, he is forcing himself to love you.
9. He struggles to affirm you
“I love you” is the most common phrase for lovers.
If your boyfriend struggles with affirming you and expressing his love to you verbally, it may be a sign that he is forcing himself to love you.
You may notice that he goes silent whenever you end the call with “I love you.”
The message is clear.
He may find you a wonderful lady, but sadly, his heart may not beat in love rhythms for you.
10. He gets irritated at you
Have you noticed that sometimes your boyfriend gets irritated at you?
Does his face and words reveal the state of his heart during these times?
You might even feel clueless when this happens because you are unsure of what triggered him.
Well, maybe he is not that into you.
It may be that he is forcing himself to love you and those times are he can’t just help but reveal his true feelings for you.
Conclusion
Before you jump to conclusions, remember that your man is human.
He has his fair share of life’s troubles.
Even if you notice one or two signs from the list above, it doesn’t automatically mean he’s forcing himself to love you.
Remember to be careful of making assumptions about a good relationship because of suspicions and unfounded fears.
But if you find out that he’s really forcing himself to love you, it’s time for both of you to go your separate ways and move on with your life.
A healthy relationship should afford the partners room for self-expression and growth without pretending or turning themselves into who they are not.