Is there really an excuse for anyone having an affair?
I guess not.
No matter how anyone poses to be unaffected by cheating and says that cheating is not their dealbreaker in relationships and, by extension, marriage, they still die inside a little every time they find out that their partner cheated on them.
It’s a case of knowing that they will never be enough for their partner due to their partner’s gross indiscipline and lack of self-control.
Whenever the topic of cheating comes up, men come to mind by default.
That doesn’t mean that there aren’t women who cheat on their partners.
They exist, but they’re not on our radar today.
Instead, we’ll focus on cheating men and the surprising phrases they use to cover up an affair.
Some men are so neck-deep into having affairs that they’d rather come up with a million and one lies and excuses to cover their actions than stop cheating.
This blog promotes faithfulness between couples who are dating and married.
In light of that, this article is dedicated to exposing the surprising phrases men use to cover up an affair.
It’ll give an insight into knowing when a man is being honest with you and when something fishy is going on with him.
Of course, you won’t forget your intuition.
If you combine it with the things you’re about to read, you can always smell an affair from miles away.
7 Surprising Phrases Men Use To Cover Up An Affair
1. “You’re overthinking things.”
“I didn’t cheat on you. It’s all in your head.” —says a chronic cheat who is already thinking of the next lady he’ll cheat on you with, again.
He’ll gaslight you and tell you that you’re making things up and reacting based on assumptions, even when you have solid proof of him cheating.
He’s usually a good actor and will act shocked and hurt that you can ever think so ‘low’ of him.
If you’re not aware, you might start doubting yourself, questioning your sanity, and second-guessing everything you thought you knew about him and the possibility of him having an affair.
The uncertainty can be overwhelming, leaving you stuck in a cycle of confusion and self-doubt.
2. “She seduced me.”
As funny as it might sound, there are men who still use this line to cover up an affair.
If there’s any truth in what he’s saying, this guy had the option of leaving that entire environment when he sensed that the other woman had an ulterior motive.
But he sat back and enjoyed the whole seduction session.
He even took it a notch higher by indulging the lady, and it metamorphosed into a full-blown affair.
Didn’t they say that it’s in men’s nature to cheat?
Well, that’s an excuse irresponsible men use to cover up their bad behavior as always, and he’s definitely living up to it.
Let him come up with a better excuse because this one is too lame.
But wait, let’s not forget that this is his version of the story.
Who knows what actually happened?
Maybe it wasn’t seduction at all, but rather a mutual attraction between two consenting adults.
Or maybe it was just an outright lie to make himself look less guilty.
Either way, this line is overused and outdated.
It’s time for men to take responsibility for their actions instead of blaming it on a supposed seductress.
3. “Your attitude pushed me to do it.”
A man can pin his having an affair on his wife’s attitude.
It could be that she’s always busy, stressed, tired, or even emotionally unavailable.
I’m not even trying to see reasons with the man here because nothing at all justifies cheating, and especially not in this case.
When he noticed that she’s beginning to grow an attitude that puts him off, the reasonable thing he should have done is to call her attention to it and have a conversation about it.
Let the couple talk about the things that keep her busy, tired, stressed, or emotionally unavailable.
And it should not just end at merely talking.
He should step up, contribute, and help out wherever, whenever, and however he can.
He should commit to making the burden lighter for her by helping out around the house.
For instance, minding the baby, doing the dishes and laundry, taking out the trash, and cooking—it all depends on the capacity in which he can function well.
He can also hire help to help around the house and make life less stressful for his wife.
I mean, a wife who is well taken care of is a happy wife, and having a happy wife equals having a happy home.
4. “I never meant for it to happen.”
While some of these phrases sound audacious and hilarious, the truth remains that men use them to cover up their affairs.
Taking a look at the phrase above, I can’t help but wonder how the minds of some of these men work.
What does he mean by he never meant for it to happen?
Cheating doesn’t just happen; it goes through a process.
It takes a buildup of communication, attraction, fantasies, and desires to actually arrive at the cheating action itself.
For a moment, let’s pretend that the buildup action itself is not emotional cheating.
When he was in constant communication and having erotic conversations with the other woman, what was he hoping to achieve?
A Ballon d’Or?
I could care less because everyone knows exactly what they are doing.
He’s only grasping at straws with this lame excuse because he was caught.
5. “You were not there for me when I needed you.”
I saw a movie where a man cheated on his wife with a waitress at the bar he frequented.
Somehow, his wife found out and confronted him with proof of his philandering.
His defense was that she wasn’t there for him when he needed her.
Apparently, he was going through some difficult times in his business, but his wife also had the family to care for and her MBA exams to study for.
She always did everything right by him and was a dutiful wife to him.
Still, he found a way to blame her for not being there for him when he never acted like he needed help in the first place.
That’s one of the mistakes some people make in relationships and marriages—assuming that their partners SHOULD know when they’re not okay and need help without them saying a word.
Everyone has their personal struggles.
The essence of marriage is to share what one is passing through with their spouse.
There’s a saying that ‘A problem shared is half-solved.’
Spouses are not mind readers and will likely not know what’s going on except the other party opens up to them.
In most cases that I’ve seen about wives with cheating husbands, these women try their best to be there for their men amidst their own struggles.
But the men still choose to find solace in the arms of other women.
6. “Your nagging and complaints pushed me away.”
It’s not surprising that somehow they’ll always find a way to make it about the woman, which is one of the characteristics of an unrepentant cheat.
He never takes responsibility for his actions and blames everyone else but himself.
For every action, there’s an equal and opposite reaction.
His wife didn’t just wake up and start nagging and complaining out of nowhere.
How did he contribute to her constant nagging and complaining?
The truth is, no matter how much you nag and complain, it does not justify cheating.
He’s fully aware of his role in the situation but will conveniently leave that part out and instead point accusing fingers at the woman.
If a spouse is feeling neglected or unhappy in a relationship, they should communicate that to their partner instead of seeking comfort elsewhere.
7. “It was just sex and didn’t mean anything to me. You’re the one that I love.”
Have you ever seen or heard of those women who say that their husbands will always come home to them after sleeping around with different women outside?
They’re the ones in this WhatsApp group, and they wholeheartedly believe the phrase above from their cheating husbands.
Sadly, it’s either that this set of women whose husbands say this do not have any self-esteem, or they’ve been brainwashed thoroughly on how their husbands should treat them.
Such a man tells his wife that he’s just having fun and catching a cruise with the other woman, and it’s her that he loves.
He reassures her that she’ll always be his wife and no one can take her place, just to give her a sense of belonging.
Of course, no one in their right senses will settle for being treated as poorly as he treats her, so he won’t want to let her go.
Yet he keeps going back for more fun and a cruise from a woman who is not his wife.
Pathetic!
If you’re observant enough, you’ll notice the trend in the phrases listed above.
They feature casting blame and giving excuses without taking responsibility for their actions, and that’s the typical behavior of cheaters.
The greatest tools they use to cover up their actions from their partners are gaslighting and creating a sense of misdirection.
Hopefully, this article will help you know better than to beat yourself up for the premeditated actions of another person.
It has pointed out the surprising phrases a cheater will use to cover up an affair.
It’s left for you to use your discretion whenever you suspect foul play.