A few years ago, a friend of mine sent an SOS to our group chat.
As is the rule of the friendship, we rallied around and met up with her at a designated place where she opened up to us about what she was going through in her relationship.
It turned out that her then boyfriend was a serial cheat, confirming what some of us suspected earlier.
As devout Christians, they were in a celibate relationship that was headed for marriage, but he was cheating on her with multiple women.
When some of our friends saw him with other women in ungodly locations and compromising positions and called her attention to it, she made excuses for him and said that it wasn’t what it looked like.
At the SOS meeting, she admitted to being fed up with his philandering ways.
Did she love him?
Yes.
But in that case, love was not enough to keep her in there.
She didn’t want to keep herself till marriage, only to end up with a cheat.
She wanted to break up with him and move on with her life for good, which was why she reached out to us, her friends.
I know that there are other people who are in the shoes my friend left a few years ago and are looking for ways to get away from cheating.
In this article, we’ll be looking at the practical steps my friend applied that helped her move on with her life, away from her partner, who was cheating on her.
Let’s get right to it.
How Do People Get Away From Cheating? Find Out 6 Ways
1. Identify what they need
I think that the first step towards getting away from cheating is identifying what you truly need.
Once anyone is able to do that, they’re well on their way to building a better life for themselves.
It happened with my friend whom I mentioned earlier in the article.
She knew that she didn’t need a cheat as a partner.
She needed someone who would be as faithful to her as she is to him.
She wanted to heal from the trauma of that relationship and be at peace with herself.
And that was the first push that put her leaving the relationship in motion.
Look around and identify the toxic traits you want to get away from.
Their exact opposites are the things you need.
Here, we’re looking at cheating and probably telling lies and gaslighting as some of the toxic traits you need to get away from.
What you need from your future partner should be faithfulness, transparency, and accountability.
The moment you start approaching your situation in such a manner, things will start coming together, and your life will begin to take shape.
2. Practice new routines
Another thing my friend did to get away from cheating is that she started practicing new routines.
She began to try out new things by herself.
We encouraged her to start envisioning her life without her ex-boyfriend in it.
That way, it was easier for her to pull off creating new schedules and indulge in activities as a single person.
She went on solo dates, saw movies alone, went shopping alone, attended social gatherings alone, and made plans that had only herself in the picture and actually carried them out.
The busier you get by filling your days with activities that do not involve your partner, the less you get used to them and the easier it is for you to forget them.
So, find and participate in new hobbies, either alone or with your friends.
When you’re having fun away from the person you’re trying to get over, you’re taking a peek at the endless possibilities of a blissful and fulfilling life ahead of you.
While at it, try as much as you can to eat healthy and engage in exercises to keep you fit.
You need to stay healthy and fit to actually live a happy life.
3. Identify the toxic patterns in their relationship
I had an ex who tells lies like it’s his second skin.
At first, I thought that he was just using it as a technique to get himself out of unfavorable situations.
However, it wasn’t long before he started displaying his lying skills in our relationship.
For every question or situation, he had a lie handy to tell.
He’ll find a way to convince you that something that’s white is black, and if you refuse to see things his way, you’re the one who has a problem.
I almost questioned my sanity and thought I was going crazy in that relationship, but mercy said no.
So, it was no surprise when telling lies entered the list of my top deal breakers in relationships.
If someone is trying to get away from cheating, one of the things they should do is look out for the patterns in the relationship they’re leaving.
They should take note of those red flags that they ignored in their relationship so that they can avoid them in the future.
For instance, if they’re leaving a relationship where they had no idea about their partner’s whereabouts and had limited access to their devices, they should aim to be with people who are transparent in their dealings in the future.
4. Spend more time with their support system
One thing that really helps when people are trying to get away from cheating is spending more time with their support system.
There will always be people who understand why you need to leave that cheating situation.
They can be your friends, family, or even colleagues.
They’ll cheer you on, boost your confidence, and encourage you to take the bold step of leaving the relationship.
These people are ever willing to hold your hand and help you every step of the way.
Having people that support you will help to cushion the effect of the hurt you’ll feel for going through a relationship breakup.
In my friend’s case, it helped that we’re a group of ladies with cheating as our common dealbreaker in relationships.
So, it’s safe to say that she had a solid support system in us when she needed us.
Thankfully, her family understood, respected, and supported her decision to end things with her partner.
5. Be clear about their expectations and boundaries
It’ll also help if you’re clear about your expectations and boundaries.
List the things you can and can’t accept in a relationship.
Write them down to serve as a reminder.
To be honest, moving on from a relationship is not as easy as it sounds.
Sometimes, it takes a lot of will and effort to actually say, “This is it,” and end a relationship.
It’s absolutely normal for you to develop cold feet along the way, and you feel your resolve to break up waver.
That’s when you pull out your list of expectations and boundaries and strengthen your resolve.
What it does is to give you the extra push, strength, and courage to follow through with your wish to walk away because you’re not getting the right treatment.
For instance, now that we’re talking about cheating, you might have listed it as one of the things you can’t accept in a relationship.
When you want to go back on your resolve, it’s in your best interest that you go through your list of expectations and boundaries and see that your partner is cheating on you.
Of course, cheating usually doesn’t stand alone.
Throw in telling lies, being manipulative, and perhaps being abusive to the mix.
If you’re being honest, that’s not how you ever want to be treated, but here you are.
The best you can do for yourself is get yourself as far away as possible from such a situation.
6. Remember that they deserve the best
I mentioned earlier about being in a relationship with a chronic liar.
When I left that relationship, one thing I never did was shortchange myself.
I knew that I deserved the best, and that alone kept me going.
I focused on being a better person, meeting new people, and indulging in thrilling experiences.
Anyone who is trying to get away from cheating and any other unfavorable trait they met in a relationship should always bear in mind that they deserve the best.
They are worthy of love—the best kind of it.
Such a person should embrace old and new passions, do things that make them happy and fulfilled, and keep an open mind when meeting people.
They should focus on living their best lives.
At the right time, the right person for them will come, and they’ll definitely be worth the wait.