Finding out that someone you like or fancy is ashamed of you can be a very heartbreaking piece of information.
It’s worse if they’re your partner.
If you suspect your man doesn’t want to be seen with you in public or is ashamed of you, your mind may go a million directions.
You may wonder why, feel hurt, or even begin to feel less of yourself.
Before feeling all of these things, you should first verify if your suspicions are right in the first place.
That’s what this post is about telling you the signs that show that he doesn’t want to be seen with you in public.
However, before we delve into it, I must let you know that even if your suspicions are right at the end of the day, you shouldn’t feel bad or less about yourself.
It says more about him than it does about you; we’ll discuss that later.
Before I get ahead of myself, let us look at the signs.
12 Signs He Doesn’t Want To Be Seen With You In Public
1. He avoids going out with you
I mean, isn’t this the most obvious of all signs?
If your man constantly tries to elude every opportunity to hang out with you in public places, that’s a strong sign.
He doesn’t want to attend events, meetings, or even casual outings like grocery shopping with you.
Whenever the opportunity to be out together in public presents itself, he dodges it.
Or perhaps he doesn’t bail out in all cases; he just selects the specific situations and occasions to attend with you.
He may be cool with attending certain events with you, but if he knows you’re likely to run into people you both know, he just won’t avail himself at all.
2. He always has an excuse for leaving you all by yourself
This is another classical sign that he doesn’t want to be seen with you publicly: excuses.
He always has an excuse for not wanting to go out with you or canceling at the last minute.
You both have to go somewhere together, and when you tell him, he sounds like he’s in.
But when the time comes, something magically comes up that he has to attend to, so he has to cancel, which has now become a pattern.
Another possible scenario is that you both, by some miracle, end up going out together, but he keeps leaving by yourself and going somewhere else.
You need to pay attention, sis; this looks like a big red flag to me.
3. He always wants to meet in secret places
A lovely dinner date at the darkest part of the restaurant, a private hotel room far away, his apartment or yours.
All of these sound romantic, and in truth, they are, but if that’s all you keep getting, I don’t know what to say.
There should be regular lunch dates, hangouts, shopping, and dinner dates in a normal relationship.
It shouldn’t be confined to one specific time but a blend of all.
You should give it a thought; why do you both have to meet only at night or in private places?
Is he Spider-Man? Or some form of undercover agent?
This man showers you with affection and all the sweetness, but it has to be in private only.
If you happen to be with him in public, he acts like a different person.
That is a sign that he doesn’t want to be seen with you in public.
4. He tells you
Sometimes, you can see a huge red banner standing before you and still be blind until you’re verbally told.
For some reason, you may not have noticed or interpreted his behavior rightly, so he tells you plainly that he doesn’t want to be seen with you in public.
It’d take a lot for a guy to tell you this, to be honest.
He probably won’t say it in those words because they’re too direct and harsh.
He may say it in other ways, such as;
“I don’t think we should put ourselves out there yet.”
“Let us keep what we share private.”
“Don’t walk up to me or hug me if we meet in a public place.”
All these things say the same thing: “I don’t want to be seen with you in public.”
And if perhaps he even saves you the stress and says it as it is, then you know that the situation is worse.
Maybe you’re his side chick, but whatever it is, now you’re sure he doesn’t want to be seen with you in public.
What you do with that information is up to you.
As painful as it may be to hear that, it’s still a nice option because most guys won’t tell you verbally; you have to read the signs yourself.
So, let’s look at some other signs.
5. He hides his plans
If I didn’t want to hang out with you, I wouldn’t tell you where I am going and when.
Secrecy and hesitation to share his plans and itinerary can be a strong sign that you’re not invited.
If your man seems hesitant about involving you in his plans, especially if they involve socializing in public spaces, maybe it’s because he doesn’t want you there.
You may notice this through inconsistencies in his statements and vague reasons for not telling you about events and plans.
One thing about these signs I’m sharing with you is that most times, when they’re seen in a relationship, they indicate the presence of a deeper issue.
6. He’s never comfortable around you in public
When it’s just you two in a room, he’s all over you and free as a bird, but everything changes once other people are present.
His body language begins to say things you don’t fully understand.
He appears distant, acts uncomfortable, avoids eye contact, or behaves like he doesn’t know you.
These signs of discomfort are saying something, and you need to listen to them.
He doesn’t engage in public conversations with you, and you’re wondering why he’s not the same person he was just a few minutes ago before you both left home.
He doesn’t want to be seen with you in public.
7. PDAs are a NO
Not only does he not want to associate with you in public, but he also avoids Public displays of affection like a plague.
You may fancy being out with your man, touching him, holding hands, or even stealing a kiss, but he won’t hear it.
It sounds like an abomination to him when you say it.
His hatred for PDA can be because he’s shy or doesn’t like it, but it may also mean that he is uncomfortable being seen with you.
8. He doesn’t post you on social media
This is tricky to judge because some people are not into social media.
They either do not like it much or don’t feel comfortable sharing important aspects of their lives.
So this can be why your man does not post your photos online.
But some men don’t mind posting everything online; they post everything they love and are proud of.
For such men, something may be wrong if he’s not posting you.
Not only does he not post your photos, but he untags himself or deletes any pictures of you both together on social media.
If you tag him on Facebook, he either untags himself or hides it from showing on his profile.
This might indicate a desire to keep the relationship private.
9. He doesn’t introduce you
A man who doesn’t want to be seen with you in public will not readily introduce you to the people in his life when they both meet them in public.
He will try to avoid following you to places where you may meet people either of you know, but if that happens, the next thing he’ll try to do is somehow avoid introducing you to them.
He doesn’t want to introduce you as his partner, so he acts ambiguous about your relationship when you meet his acquaintances or colleagues.
If you asked me, this is a cause for concern.
10. Reactive behavior
You may observe that he’s unnecessarily defensive or overly reactive when you suggest being out together.
The topic of being seen in public together agitates him in a way you don’t understand.
He tries to deflect or avoid discussions about why he’s acting the way he is.
Sis, I know you may try to be quiet to avoid getting him pissed, but that is a bad idea.
It needs to be talked about.
11. Monitoring social interactions
Your man being excessively concerned about where you’re both going and who you’re likely to run into in those places says a lot.
Most men don’t concern themselves with overthinking where they’re going with their partner, so if he’s doing it, it may be because he’s trying to avoid meeting specific people in public.
He wants to be sure you’re both good to places where you’re unlikely to meet a familiar face because he doesn’t want to be seen with you.
12. Third party comments
Sometimes, our friends, family, and loved ones help us see when we’re blind.
Has your friend or family member ever expressed concern about your partner’s behavior in this aspect?
Perhaps they’ve observed that he’s never with you in public, and they’re wondering why.
Or maybe they’ve even clearly seen your partner’s reluctance to be seen with you in public.
I’m not encouraging you to listen to everybody’s opinions and contributions to your relationship, but observations like this could be a noteworthy external perspective.
If you have observed one or more of these signs in your man, then you need to talk about it.
These signs not only indicate that he doesn’t want to be seen with you in public, but they could also mean something more serious and deeper.
However, it is important that you first talk about it to be sure.
There could be other reasons or motivations for his actions, so you need to clarify.
However, this shouldn’t make you feel bad about yourself.
Whatever his reason for being reluctant to be seen in public with you, there are wiser and healthier ways for him to handle and sort it out.