7 Things You Should Always Keep Private About Your Life

“I am not reclusive. I just have a private life”–Enya

You must have heard that “there is love in sharing” and “a problem shared is a problem solved”…

This is true in some cases…

However, sometimes there is wisdom in silence, and keeping certain matters secret will ensure you don’t need to share your problem to solve it.

Knowing what you are meant to share with the public and what you shouldn’t is wisdom.

Sadly, with the increasing technological innovations in communication that have made the world a global village, it is becoming common for people to post everything about themselves.

It is so easy to post on Facebook, tweet on Twitter, send snaps on Snapchat and post on your WhatsApp status anytime something happens in your life.

The very fact that you are asking if it’s okay to keep things private is a sign that we have a privacy problem in our generation.

I am not asking you to stop talking to people.

However, you should know when you are beginning to overshare.

To help you identify when you are about to cross this line, I have curated a list of things you should always keep private about your life.

Let’s go!

7 Things You Should Always Keep Private About Your Life

1. Your income

Unless you are running for a public position, applying for a loan, or buying a new car by paying in installments, your income should not be a topic of conversation.

Yeah, I mean this.

Not even when you are invited to give a speech to motivate others in your chosen field.

It is advisable to keep this private for several reasons, none of which involve being scared of sabotage by jealous people.

You see, I am a Nigerian, and there is one thing we have in abundance here: superstitious beliefs.

Here, people are encouraged to be secretive about the good things that happen in their lives because of wicked witches who never want to see people succeed.

So, buying a new car and posting about it on social media is considered unnecessary bragging.

If you ever have an accident in that new car, it can never result from your carelessness, that of the other driver, or even the poor state of the road.

It must be your “village pipo” that are after you.

The term “village pipo” is a euphemism to refer to those wicked witches.

You should keep your income private because many organizations don’t have a fixed salary structure.

Your earnings depend on how well you can negotiate with them during employment interviews.

You may find out that you earn far more than other people at your level.

This could be because you have special skills, but your colleagues won’t think of it that way.

It could cause severe conflicts in the office.

Also, if you earn a high monthly income, flaunting it may make you a target for kidnappers who want to collect high ransoms.

Not being discreet about your income can be a security risk.

If you are earning far more than your friends, you may also make them jealous of you.

Although any friend who gets jealous of your success always is no friend, you still need to keep your income private.

2. Your savings

I am sure you are wondering why I am so focused on money-related issues.

The fact is that we sometimes underestimate the power of money and what it can do to people.

The Bible says, “The love of money is the root of all evil.”

This means any form of evil can be traced to the love of money.

What you have in your savings should be no one’s business but yours and your husband’s if you are married.

It’s your savings for a reason.

The whole world doesn’t need to know how much you have there.

Sometimes, I see people talking about how much they have saved online because they want to encourage us to save as well.

It is very risky to do so.

3. Your personal struggles

I know you have heard that “a problem shared is a problem solved,” but this doesn’t mean you should share your struggles with just anybody.

Sometimes, sharing your problems with the wrong person would only complicate matters even further.

I am not asking you to keep your personal struggles to yourself, but you need to ensure that you trust whomever you share them with.

If you need therapy or counseling, engage the services of professionals who know what they are doing and have confidentiality clauses.

Honestly, I know the power of just being able to talk about what you are going through.

It can bring so much relief to you even if the person doesn’t proffer any solution because it now feels like you are not the only one battling with it.

However, try not to share your problems with others except you trust them.

4. Relationship details

Just a few minutes ago, I was scrolling through Instagram and came across a rant sent in by a lady who said her friend had betrayed her.

Her friend had “snatched” her fiancé.

I have always had an issue with the word “snatch.”

How do you “snatch” a grown man?

Is he a handbag or a phone?

In the story, she mentioned that her boyfriend had been so good to her, and she used to tell her friend about all the good things he did for her.

Unknown to her, her friend was jealous of their relationship and wanted the man for herself.

Which she later did.

My point is that regardless of how sweet or bitter your relationship is, details about your relationship should be kept private.

This is another important thing we must learn about in this digital age.

I see young people posting everything that happens in their relationship on social media, and I am shocked.

When did your relationship become a topic for the general public?

It is a sad state of affairs, and many relationships suffer from the unhealthy attention they receive from outsiders who should know nothing about them.

Keep your relationship private.

You shouldn’t be posting about your relationship or complaining about your partner every day.

If you are a content creator in dire need of content, go out there and mix with people; you will get the content you need.

Once again, never put your relationship out there.

It makes the public feel like they have a say in your relationship.

What if he is abusing you?

If he is abusing you, talking to your friends and family will help you.

You can also talk to a professional relationship counselor.

The fact is that you already know what to do when a man abuses you, so you don’t need to share it with the public.

Leave that relationship while your friends and family can serve as a support system for you.

5. Other people’s secrets

If someone trusts you enough to confide private information in you, you should never consider making it known to the world.

One of the perks of being the youngest while growing up was that my siblings told me stuff.

My elder sister would tell me something and say, “Don’t tell anybody o”.

My brother would do the same, and so I found myself in the position of keeping everyone’s secrets.

I tried my best to keep everyone’s secrets secret, but sometimes I failed at it.

My point is that as adults, we should understand that when someone confides in us, we shouldn’t break their trust by spilling their secrets out in public.

It probably wasn’t easy for them to decide to confide in you, and you shouldn’t reward that trust with betrayal.

Imagine how you would feel if someone did that to you.

You don’t wish to inflict that sort of pain on someone else, right?

6. Family problems

One thing most people don’t know is that everyone has family problems.

The person you are telling about your family problems sometimes has bigger problems than yours.

So, why are they not telling the world?

Because they understand that washing their dirty linen in public solves nothing.

Family issues should always stay within the family.

Whenever you feel someone is prying into your family business, you shouldn’t just start spilling all the details.

Tell them you are uncomfortable discussing such private matters with them or change the topic.

7. Your dreams and goals

I know that Martin Luther King Jr. publicly spoke about his dreams in his great speech, “I Have a Dream.”

However, if you notice, he talked to the public about his dream for a whole nation.

In other words, there were not goals for his personal life.

It’s best to share your personal dreams and goals with only a few trusted people who can motivate you towards achieving them.

The problem with sharing your dreams and goals with too many people is that you may end up being a lot less motivated than you should be because everyone you share it with will have an opinion about it.

They may try to criticize your dreams and discourage you from attaining your goals, especially if they don’t understand them.

The fact remains that people fear what they don’t understand, and to ensure that you fulfill your goals, you need to confide in a few trusted friends.

Your dreams are yours, and you deserve to nurture them with peace of mind and sureness of heart.

You can only get this with privacy.

Ultimately, many of the things we put out there are supposed to be kept private.

Learning this will help you a lot as you will be able to avoid unnecessary complications that come with oversharing.

The world may think you are a recluse, but you may find out that you will live your best life if you keep all these things private.