Sometimes, we get so excited at the beginning of a romantic relationship that we overlook the differences between our partners and ourselves.
Your eyes are covered with rose-tinted glasses, which makes everything seem to fall in place and look perfect.
The truth is that if you ignore the red flags of a damaged woman and get into a relationship with her, reality and, invariably, trouble will set in once the infatuation wears off.
Sadly, you may be too neck-deep into the relationship by then.
No matter how much you want to believe that, a woman is perfect for you, knowing the red flags of a damaged woman is important in a relationship.
You’re no mind reader.
To know if her presence in your life benefits or harms you, you need to pay attention to her actions and words.
In line with that, this article aims to show you the red flags of a damaged woman.
Let’s get started!
7 Red Flags Of A Damaged Woman
1. She uses insulting words on you
Words are powerful in the sense that once they’re uttered, there’s no going back despite the apologies.
Does your woman use insulting words on you?
For instance, she makes you feel bad about your choices and may call you ‘stupid.’
If yes, it’s a major red flag.
Friends can engage in banters like that, but it’s not healthy for romantic relationships.
It would be best to be cautious of how you talk to each other.
Treat and talk to each other with respect.
You can banter without using insulting words on each other.
One of the greatest red flags of a damaged woman is that she downgrades you with her words, either directly or indirectly.
If she keeps throwing insults at you for making mistakes or making different choices from her, it’ll gradually take a toll on your self-confidence, leaving you with self-doubt.
Your partner should hone your good qualities rather than water them down.
2. She gaslights you constantly
One of the red flags of a damaged woman is that she gaslights you to the point that you doubt your reality.
Gaslighting is a trait that toxic people possess.
It’s a form of emotional abuse that may not be glaring at the onset of a relationship.
It usually shows itself when you’ve spent some reasonable time in the relationship.
This is why it’s a toxic and dangerous trait.
Whenever you voice your feelings about a situation, she’ll say things like, “You need help,” “You’re crazy or sick for thinking or feeling this way,” or “You’re overreacting and need to calm down.”
You’ll start doubting yourself, your feelings, and your reality when it happens repeatedly.
Her aim of gaslighting you is to attack you by hurting your confidence, be able to control you, guilt trip you, and isolate you.
You’re in for a whole lot if you’re in that toxic relationship for a long time because she’ll strip the last bit of self-confidence you have on you with gaslighting.
3. She acts like the victim
If your woman is constantly acting like the victim in every unsavory situation, it’s a sign that she’s damaged.
It seems like everyone and everything is against her.
She’s always quick to point out the negative sides of the people around her.
Of course, she’ll carry her pessimism into your relationship, and it’ll always cause problems in the relationship because she never sees anything good in anyone, including you.
If this is the case, she’s very insecure.
What’s happening here is that she regards every banter and spoken word as an attack on her person.
She doesn’t trust you, and her insecurity makes her scrutinize everything you say to her.
Be very mindful of negative behaviors such as this.
They do not speak well of someone in a relationship because they’ll constitute a nuisance for their partner.
4. She has a dysfunctional relationship with her family
If we’re talking about the red flags of a damaged woman, you’re probably going to focus on your relationship with her.
But it’s also good that you consider her relationship with her family.
It goes a long way to determine if she’s damaged.
How does she relate to her parents?
Is she constantly fighting with her father, who is the first male figure in her life?
Then, it’s a pattern that’ll repeat itself with you.
Also, why is she constantly having problems with her family?
Are the problems from her or her family?
If they’re from her, you’re in for a “long thing” (rough journey).
Like gaslighting, this toxic trait is usually not obvious at the beginning of the relationship because you’re not going to know everything about her family before you get into the relationship.
5. She’s extremely clingy to you
Extreme clinginess is a red flag in a relationship.
Add that to a habit of quickly moving from one relationship to another.
Often, her clinginess and neediness in a relationship is an indication that without a relationship, she feels lost and without an identity.
If she needs to be in a relationship to feel like a normal person, it’s screaming all shades of red flags.
Perhaps when you met her, she was suffering from depression, which was caused by her last breakup.
Getting into a relationship with you cured her depression.
You’ll also notice that she slips into depression whenever you both get into a fight and you stop talking to her or threaten to leave the relationship.
Bro, that woman is damaged.
She only places value on being in a relationship and not with you, who she’s in a relationship with.
If your relationship hits the rocks today, she’ll readily jump into another relationship with another person immediately.
6. The relationship is one-sided
If the relationship is one-sided, you’ll notice that you contribute more than her in the relationship.
I know that it’s practically impossible to have a fifty-fifty ratio of giving and receiving in a relationship, but at least let there be mutualism to a great extent between both parties.
You can’t even count on your partner to be there for you during tough times.
It’s a red flag.
What then is the primary aim of a relationship if not for companionship, care, and support?
I’m not saying that you should keep tabs on what you and your partner do individually in a relationship.
No.
You’ll naturally know that there’s mutualism in your relationship through the efforts your partner puts into it.
The one-sidedness of your relationship doesn’t necessarily have to wait till you’re in tough times to manifest.
Check out how this woman treats you regularly.
Apart from feeling like you’re the only one making an effort in the relationship, you’ll also notice that you’re the one who always chooses the path of peace in resolving arguments rather than resorting to fights.
7. She is controlling
One of the red flags of a damaged woman is jealous, controlling behavior.
It’s also obtainable in men.
It’s not limited to any gender, and unfortunately, more people than you can imagine often encounter this jealous and controlling behavior from their partners.
For instance, she may disapprove of the things you love doing in your leisure time and talk you into stopping them.
It can also be that she’s jealous of the time you spend with your loved ones, so she regulates the time you spend with them.
You might think that the real picture of control is when your woman openly tells you what to and what not to do.
I’m here to tell you that, most times, controlling behavior is very subtle.
You might be spending time with a woman who is controlling, and you won’t realize what she’s doing over time.
Sometimes, to let peace reign in the relationship, you’ll start trying to dance to her tune.
Ultimately, she controls you and your reality, which is not suitable for you.
Final Words
Love is beautiful, and so is being in a relationship; however, being with the right person is important.
No one is perfect, but everyone should have minimal flaws that won’t become burdensome to other people.
That’s why there’s self-development and therapy.
Damaged people need to work on themselves first and become better before getting into relationships to avoid ruining the lives of innocent and unsuspecting people with their toxic traits.
If you’re seeing a damaged woman or are already in a relationship with her, you now know exactly why she’s exhibiting those behaviors.
It’s up to you to know what’s best for you – leave her or help her get some help for herself.
The ball is in your court.